May 25, 2005
A Virtual Bag Full Of… Stuff
Sorry for the momentary stillness, gang. This is what happens when the fake blog you set up to take the piss actually diverts your attention from your proper, sexy full-time blog.
So what have we missed out on?
Nick & Jessica File For Divorce - But Don’t!
For the three of you who tune in every Wednesday morning to hear the ausculture.com spot at 8:45am on the saucy 2SER (107.3 - plug!), this will be old news delightfully combined with an informative update of events. This morning, E Online placed an article online about Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson stating the following.
More here. But then…
Not long afterwards, the article was replaced with… nothing in particular. You can check out a screenshot in the picture below (via Stereogum, yet again).
After what seemed to be a preposterously long delay, E Online then put this message on it’s website.
So what can we conclude, kids? Listen, if Tom & Katie can carry on a completely believable and inspiring love affair in this crazy world, then we can’t see why Nick & Jess can’t make it work.
Speaking Of Tom & Katie…
Have we all been enjoying the All New & Completely Insane & Desperately In Need Of A Ritalin Prescription Tom Cruise? Nothing makes me feel more warm and fuzzy than watching a celebrity become a parody of their former self. Defamer published a wonderful piece on Tom’s frightening appearance on Oprah which contained truly spectacular photos of his cuckoo behaviour.
Passionate little bastard, isn’t he? Now let’s see him moving, baby! (via Pink Is The New Blog)
I AM SO HOT FOR WOMEN, I MIGHT JUST LEAP UPON YOU AND PUT MY PENIS IN YOUR VAGINA, OPRAH! HA HA HA HA HA
Carrie was also rather fascinated by Cruise’s nutbaggery. Anyhow, if we’ve had to sit through Oprah’s Friends special AND Oprah’s 50th Birthday Wankerama over the past few months here in Australia, we must insist that the Tom Cruise\Oprah special is shown on telly here at once.
Dogs Always Know, Britney
Finally, Britney Spears’ wee doggy Lucky has reportedly rejected her husband and womb-filler Kevin Federline.
It was probably a close call, though.
Posted by Jess at May 25, 2005 08:28 PM— Filed under Common
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The Tom Cruise on Oprah debacle
Sadly, I did not see it. I am extremely bummed, because it sounds like it was HILARIOUS. Here is a fantastic compilation of "the public's reaction" to it. You have to read all those posts. They are SUPREMELY funny. I...
Hahaha, I love your fake blog Jess! Especially that it’s Pty Ltd.! Are you going to keep it up?
Reply to this
According to Sandra Sully, the Oprah show will air in 2-3 weeks.
If there’s one person we can trust in this mixed up world, it’s dear old Sandra Sully!
On the topic of Ms Sully, my beloved chum Poinaa still fondly recalls the time she walked into his shop.
Not normally the romantic type, to this day his eyes go misty when he hears her name and he tends to dreamily sigh “Sandra fucking Sully… the most beautiful woman in the world.”
Ladies, he’s single and ready for love! Email me with photos if you want some Pointdaddy pleasure. (he also has a massive penis) (i can only assume)
You can a clip of some of the more embarrassing parts at TVgasm.