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August 2, 2006

Introducing… Mr Dave Hill.

A few months ago, Ms Fits emailed me this link and declared that the star of the video was her “new favourite person in the world”. I sought out more videos of the fellow and sure enough, it became clear to every single person I know (or at the very least, my housemates and their lovers and various chums) that he was quite the comedic genius.

This was the clip that sold me.

The man behind the funnies? Ladies and gentlemen, please meet Dave Hill.

Clem and I will be interviewing Dave tonight on I’d Rather Jack at around 12.30am, which works out to be a pretty reasonable time where Dave is. Excellent. You can listen on 102.7FM if you’re in Melbourne, otherwise you can stream the show from the RRR website.

Until then - here’s a quick interview I did with Dave so you can get an idea of what the man’s about. Jolly good.

Q. Who the hell are you, and what do you do? Please feel free to lie and\or embellish as you see fit.

My name is Dave Hill and I am one of the world’s greatest entertainers, which is to say that I am pretty much exactly like Tobey Maguire only a bit taller. I would like to think I also have better hair but I guess that’s not really for me to say.

Q. You’re to be interviewed by I’d Rather Jack quite shortly. What do you hope to gain from exposure to an Australian community radio show’s seventeen devoted listeners*?

I’m hoping this will cut down on all the namecalling I am usually subjected to when I come down there. Actually, in the interest of full disclosure, I have never been there but I’m told it’s quite nice. If I pop for the air fare, can I stay at your house? Be honest. If this is not cool you need to give me the heads up on this right now so I can make other arrangements. I am tired of the bullshit.

Q. What can listeners of RRR expect to hear from you when they tune in on Wednesday night… Crazy conspiracy theories? Extraordinary showbiz tales? Frighteningly detailed descriptions of physical ailments?

I imagine it will be not unlike when the Beatles first came to America, only it will be just one guy instead of four guys and I will only be on the phone and not really there in person. Also, I will not have nearly as much to offer aside from the great hair mentioned in response to question #1. Still, I think it will be a great day for me and hopefully a slightly better one for the people of Australia. I plan to make light chit-chat mostly and then at one point I will inexplicably burst into tears and then in the background you might hear someone yelling at me about putting some goddamn pants on before I just go sitting on the good furniture like that. Then there will be a long silence followed shortly after by the resuming of the sounds of a grown man crying. Then I will reveal to your audience that I have been a delicious sandwich throughout the course of the interview.

*We jest, we jest. There’s at least forty.