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July 3, 2005
Shearer - Woohoo! Gets Evicted - Woohoo!
Big Brother 2005’s legendary (and inexplicable) lady-killer Glenn has been swiftly booted from the Gold Coast compound tonight with an overwhelming 49% of votes from the public. Apparently the housemates are bewildered -
Since Australia loves nothing more than a slow-paced country bumpkin, the housemates were probably quite right to be surprised by Glenn’s exit this evening. In a world of Martys and Nolls, Glenn should have been exactly the type of person to win Big Brother. But it turns out having a fair dinkum Strayun accent and wearing too much flannel isn’t enough to do well in reality shows these days. WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO THIS CRAZY WORLD?!
Glenn arrived on the eviction stage to the sound of booing from the crowd - so he happily cheered himself on. He seemed genuinely confused as to why people might not be impressed with him after his time in the house. Thankfully, Gretel was at her school marm best and she attempted valiantly to show him moments from his time in the house which, frankly, made him look like a sleazy try-hard fuck wit.
She may as well have discussed his behaviour with an inanimate object - perhaps his famous tight footy shorts - as I dare say they would have grasped what she she was trying to get across a little better.
You’ve got to admire a man so incredibly dim that he continues to scream “woohoo” in an admiring manner when shown footage of his naughty behaviour - all while the crowd is in the middle of baying for his blood. Dear sweet foolish Glenn, they were never going to “woohoo” you back.
Gretel asked him if he regretted his behaviour in the house - nah, mate. He was there for a good time, not a long time. The crowd weren’t happy, so Gretel gently pushed again, hoping Glenn would take the hint and display some sort of remorse which may have calmed down the unimpressed crowd. He seemed oblivious and continued to insist he was just being himself.
Finally, Gretel managed to get him to smirk out an “I’m sorry” - but bless his honest true blue soul, when she immediately asked him to confirm whether he was “really sorry” or just trying to say what the crowd wanted to hear, he mumbled something along the lines of “Juss sayin’ what the ord-yence wanna ‘ear, maaaate”. More boos.
When Gretel originally announced it was time for Glenn to go, I sent a text message to my beloved Big Brother banter buddy saying something along the lines of “Here’s hoping they do a Fryzie\Monica situation and bring Michelle out on stage!” Imagine my sheer delight when THEY DID JUST THAT!
Michelle swanned onstage in the manner of an angry wronged woman on a Jerry Springer episode - if she’d picked up a chair, I would not have been at all surprised. She wasted no time in giving him the thumbs down and informing him he was “a jerk!”
His earlier brave face crumbled in the face of his pissed off former paramour. He crossed his arms in a frightened sort of way, looked at the ground and for the first time appeared to be appropriately chastened as he offered up an “I’m sorry” to Michelle. Ha! She tore some strips off him, Gretel looked stern, and Glenn actually looked like he might cry.
Perhaps realising that he’d - deservedly or no - copped a fair bit of flack on his eviction night, Gretel tried to add that Glenn was also an “entertaining” housemate. Yes, Glenn - YOU’RE AN MISOGYNISTIC SCUMBAG WHO CAN’T KEEP HIS COUNTRY COCK IN HIS FOOTY SHORTS but that time you did the pole dance sure made us laff. Everybody, let’s hear it for GLENN THE LOVABLE ARSEHOLE!
Deep down, I’m sure Glenn isn’t a bad bloke. He just cared too much about impressing “his mates” and if that had to happen at the expense of a chick, so be it. It’s all for a laugh, maaaate. Just a bit of fun and that! He’s no different to tonnes of 21 year olds out there - he was just too simple to realise that making disparaging remarks about female housemates and talking about your randy plans out loud while being filmed for national television probably won’t endear you to an audience. At least he was honest with the public, even if he didn’t behave in a thoroughly decent and truthful way when it came to the ladies.
Oh Lord. It was the best eviction ever. I screamed and cringed and laughed and kicked the air with joyful abandon as Glenn was put through the wringer. Sadistic, but incredibly entertaining and gratifying.
Posted by Jess at July 3, 2005 11:23 PM— Filed under
Comments
Yes, sadistic. But that does seem to be the way BB is playing it this year, and it has been entertaining. In past years I might have been appalled at the arbitrary manner in which the HMs have been treated. This year's HMs have been carefully chosen to possess personality traits so irksome that it is often quite satisfying when they are penalised by BB. Sometimes I wonder how on earth Tim was cast with this lot, but I'm so glad he was.
Posted by: X | July 4, 2005 4:36 AM
He was so cocky with that towel still on leading up to the eviction.
Posted by: Gareth | July 4, 2005 11:03 AM
He was shocked to get nominated, shocked to get evicted and shocked that everyone in Australia thinks he is a prick.
Best...Eviction...Ever!
Posted by: Matt | July 4, 2005 12:03 PM
RIDICULOUSLY satisfying. Now, get off my tv screen and stay off, you revolting little weasel dick man. Oh, and Glenn? You're much MUCH uglier than Geneva . . .
Posted by: TallulahBelle | July 4, 2005 12:44 PM
I think the best bit was his face when they showed the final clip package; his guffawing suddenly quietened, arms still crossed, and did anyone else catch that little glance sideways in Michelle's direction? Brilliant.
Posted by: -al. | July 4, 2005 2:12 PM
A bit OT but Dean is one massive cunt.
http://bigbrother.3mobile.com.au/news/article_269.asp
Fuck that, the question should be what the hell did they think it was humourous to defacate the girls toilet, not why Tim decided to "rat out" on the boys.
Posted by: Mushroom | July 5, 2005 1:46 AM
And why, oh WHY, has Dean not been awarded a strike for his incredibly threatening and bullying behaviour towards Tim over this? Is it because BB doesn't want to have to put him up for eviction as well? Dean is an arrogant little twat.
Posted by: TallulahBelle | July 5, 2005 3:12 PM
The only person more ANNOYING than Glenn the Bogan.
Is Fitsy the SUPER-BOGAN
On Friday Nights when I am not doing anything, I dont mind a bit of BB Games, it's always fun to watch Christie stack it.
BUT my enjoyment is ruined by that jerk Fitzy and his overuse of the words "Struth"..."Mate".."Noggin"
He is a complete disgrace, it is shameful to see a knob like that on the TV. He cant speak english. It is not acceptable at all.
That's all. I really needed to vent that.
Posted by: Dr_Pelican | July 5, 2005 6:33 PM
My God I couldn't agree more. And a few things he's said have made me doubt that he even watches Big Brother. Deplorable!
Posted by: bludger | July 5, 2005 7:22 PM
And now - shearer mark 2 is gone as well.
I'm relieved. Now how do we get Christie the blabbermouth twat and Dean the supercilious knob out of there?
Posted by: Watermelon Boy | July 6, 2005 1:33 AM
I want to know if there is some way to ensure that the Big Bogan evictees of past and present series are made to read this. They need to know the truth. I am also sickened by Mike Goldman's gushing crush on HS Kate. I have disturbing visions of him lurking around the crew windows looking in when he's not even supposed to be at work!!
Posted by: katie home | July 7, 2005 2:35 AM
Seems like "jess" is showing off her feminist side, maybe in too much of a flamboyant fashion. Last year, Merlin or whatever his name was completed fucked up Gretel's night by throwing a bit of a protest. Now, Gretel saw this as completely rude and had a big go at Merlin on national TV the next chance she got.
In my opinion, putting Glenn on the spot like that, just as she was done the year before, is utterly hipocritical.
I'm happy Michelle ended up looking like a slut, because no matter how they show it, or how she tries to defend herself, she did get her kit off and she did give Glenn a ride in the bath, on NATIONAL TV. What the fuck does she expect.
Posted by: Dan | July 7, 2005 4:01 AM
Bitch PLEASE.
Glenn was voted out by a massive margin. Gretel was giving the crowd what they wanted. It was thrilling. And Gretel was brilliant.
Posted by: Fop | July 7, 2005 11:03 AM
"Bitch Please"
LOL
I'm with Fop. Glenn is a dick and deserved the humiliation he got.
Posted by: Mushroom | July 7, 2005 11:19 AM
"And Gretel was brilliant."
She took the path of least resistance, at the expense of Glenn, who is one of the only ones being himself in the BB house.
Put Gretel in Glenn's shoes, she would kick shit to no end.
Posted by: Dan | July 7, 2005 10:15 PM
So just because he's "being himself", he should be allowed to get away with anything?
And, the path of "least resistance" would surely have been to give him a nice, vanilla interview that didn't call him on any of his indiscretions - ie, the less confrontation involved, the easier it would be for Gretel. Intelligently interrogating someone and holding them to account for their actions is hardly the path of least resistance.
Posted by: Fop | July 8, 2005 4:06 PM
As I missed the show a little while ago, could someone please fill me in on the shocking conversation Glenn and the boys had about Michelle in the spa? Keep hearing bout it
Posted by: Jen | July 8, 2005 7:44 PM
Have you seen this before? It's a number guessing game: http://www.amblesideprimary.com/ambleweb/mentalmaths/guessthenumber.html. I guessed 33756, and it got it right! Pretty neat.
Posted by: Merideth Carleton | May 23, 2006 3:08 PM