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September 12, 2004
Q. When Is “Pop” Not Pop?
A. On Australian Idol “Pop” Theme Week
However, I’ll let it go because a lot of the songs whose pop genre status was questionable were performed adequately, if not brilliantly. But still - just think how fantastic it would have been to have heard Chanel trill Britney’s “Toxic” or watch Daniel Belle belting out New Edition’s “Candy Girl”.
To save a complete recap of the entire show (yes, I’m lazy - but there’s also other top secret plans being formulated which are taking up much of my time…) here are a few random points, followed by the Top Three and my Bottom Three wish list.
Amali - I seriously don’t get why Dicko called her a “Butter Voice” last week. I think she’s really quite good!
Sure, she’s nervous - but she’s getting better week by week, and she’s so adorable. Watching her perform last night with my two male fellow apartment dwellers, we managed to last about thirty seconds without comment before I couldn’t help exclaiming “My god! What marvellous tits!” The boys were in complete agreeance (repeatedly, for the rest of the night). The girl is sixteen, it’s so so so wrong and yet - she really is a little minx. Not of the Slinkee variety though, thank god.Daniel Belle and Chanel are so going to sex each other, and this is rather excellent because if they get married she’ll be Chanel Belle. Though admittedly “Chanel Belle” sounds like a slightly expensive hooker in a Parisian brothel.
Anthony Calea is growing on me. I DON’T KNOW WHY, LORD! But he is.
Marty is still a fucking tool. I do NOT get the “Yay, ultra-talented Marty!” thing that the judges go on about.
He sounded like a knob tonight, with an American accent and cutesy movements on stage. I want to smack him right in the chops. My pet hate, other than the chest rug, is that smarmy feckin’ grin he does after he finishes the song which screams “I’m so good, yeah - I rock! I’m Marty “ROCK” Worrall, cower in wonder at my sexy rock poses! Bring on the luuuurve, judges - you know you want me, don’t you? LICK MY NIPPLES!”Chanel was good, as she always is. I love “History Repeating” and she managed to pull off Ms Bassey delightfully. Other than Green Limosine, Chanel’s consistently picked songs I love. Hurrah!
Dan O’Connor is still by FAR the weakest singer in the bunch, and Creed DOES suck the proverbial nuts. But he’s so cute! Cute and Christian! This is attractive because hussy women like myself long to corrupt good Christian boys.
Casey’s performance was a little lacklustre, Daniel Belle’s was alright but a little too… oh, I don’t know… not pop for my liking, Courtney and Ricki-Lee were rather good, Hayley is too gentle to be singing fierce, vicious, ball-tearing songs like Anastacia’s (take that how you will), and Emelia did a decent version of Pink’s “Family Portrait” but in my opinion, she should have sung “Trouble” instead.
Top Three
In A Fair & Just World, Plus One Cos I’m Indecisive!
Chanel Cole
Amali Ward
Courtney Murphy\Ricki-Lee Coulter
Bottom Three
In A Fair & Just World, Even Though I Still Want To Lick Some Of Them!
Marty Fucking Worrall
Dan O’Connor (slurp)
Casey Donavon (sorry dollface, just didn’t float my boat last night!)
Am I right? Am I wrong? Probably a little of both!
Posted by Jess at September 12, 2004 9:51 PM— Filed under Australian Idol 2004 Blogfest
Comments
Ah Jess...as always, you are tough but fair. I actually agree with you 100%. And if THAT doesn't get you excited, then quite frankly I don't know what would.
I'd put Ricki-Lee about Courtney, if only for the fact that Courtney just strikes me as a daggy guy destined to a life of RSL performances...well, moreso than the others anyway.
You want to lick Dan? Not before me, you don't!
I loathe the R. Kelly song, I loathe Anthony...but dammit, he was REALLY good! Me and my crazy flatmate were both grooving away. It was a beautiful thing.
Posted by: scottie | September 13, 2004 1:04 PM
Magnificent tits can get you a lot of places, but not into my top 3. Amali has a terrible nasally voice. The irony of her song choice "Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance" was brilliant - as she nervously sidled on the spot. Courtney is a legend. I hadn't heard him sing before, but he is cool. I agree, I can't believe how bad Dan is. He really has no voice at all. I'd also put Daniel in my bottom 3. His voice ain't all that, and is only made worse by his personality.
Posted by: wilko | September 13, 2004 1:09 PM
I agree with Jess about everything, and in particular -Anthony growing on me!! I am also unable to explain why! And whilst i too loved Amali's tits, I felt like both a lesbian AND a paedophile!! (which is ALL WRONG) Chanel is just a bit TOO CUTE, so i am undecided on her. Ricky Lee will win.
Yes that's right, i was out for birthday drinks on Saturday night and can i just say they were DIVINE??? They weren't all there, but here are my comments. Emilia is so CUTE and was really friendly. Hayley was also cute, and got emabarassed when i told here she was great. Anthony was again...cute and really really short and Dan, well I wanted to have my way with him there and then, but he wasn't having it.
NB: These memories may be tainted by the fact i ws shitfaced at the time...
Posted by: Sheree | September 13, 2004 1:55 PM
OH GOD! I glanced over this article before I read it... and thought that was a photo of Cosima... no Amali. Werid!
On the topic of Amali... I'd put her WAY below Casey... Emeilia... Anothony any day... despite the clevage.
AND NO you silly girl! Chanel is going to have hot wild passionate monkey sex with Ben. Its obvious... they are getting on with the low down love! :P I dont know how its obvious... but it just is!
Oh... also... you forgot the best part of the show! James' "pull it off" comment REALLY cracked me up! But then again im infantile!
Posted by: Adam | September 13, 2004 2:47 PM
I have little more to offer than to say that Amali Ward walking out onto the stage was the hottest thing I've ever seen in my 23 years, many of which have been spent checking out the female portion of the planet... so it's a big wrap. And yet, so thoroughly deserving.
Posted by: Grant | September 13, 2004 2:57 PM
Which "pull it off" comment was that?! Did I miss a double entendre?! Damn it!
And I'm fairly sure that Ben and Chanel are just friends. Daniel on the otherhand - Chanel is totally flirting with him and he's nervous but enjoying the excitement. *
*All this spotted in Thursday's Inside Idol. I'm very perceptive so don't worry if you didn't see the fireworks that I saw...
Posted by: Jess | September 13, 2004 3:25 PM
And Amali is a little vixen!
As Sheree above so nicely put it - for a moment there, I felt rather like a lesbian AND a paedophile.
Posted by: Jess | September 13, 2004 3:28 PM
Excited? EXCITED? Big Kev on cocaine and Viagra couldn't be as excited as I am right now!
I dunno - there's something quite lovely about Courtney in a Mix 106.5 way. A lot of ladies are going to love his voice, especially those of them middle aged variety. He could do alright!
Anthony - his fashion mullet is getting less noticable, and when he sang "Honey's to the left of me, fella's to my right..." you could totally tell he was trying to work out which of the two he'd prefer to shag. AUSTRALIANS LOVE SEXUALLY AMBIGUOUS POPSTARS! Look at Darren Hayes!
Posted by: Jess | September 13, 2004 3:52 PM
Terrible? NASALLY? Why do you say these things?! Is it to hurt me, Wilko? Sniffle... :)
You know what? I don't really enjoy listening to Daniel sing all that much, but I'm not sure if it's the songs he's chosen or just his voice. That said, I REALLY want to see him get surly again or at the very least, get sprung in Chanel's bed on Inside Idol...
Posted by: Jess | September 13, 2004 3:55 PM
What you offer is enough, friend.
You have seen what I have seen - the future of Aussie pop starlets.
We are prophets.
We are...
... The Amalians ...
Posted by: Jess | September 13, 2004 3:58 PM
Umm lets see... Daniel Belle said something along the lines of "I was worried about it all this week, I didnt know if I could pull it off, but it seemed okay..."
To which James said: "Well.. If you'd like to see Daniel PULL IT OFF next week live.. extended pause.. you'll have to call yadayadayada"
Okay I so didnt spot that on Thurs night! hrmm. Then again I was watching it while I had my head stuck inside a marketing textbook.. so there you go.
DANIEL BELLE IS ANGELINA JOLIE! The secret is out, it cannot be hidden anymore. Hmm... Chanel with Angelina Jolie * mind wanders off with the possibilities *
Posted by: Adam | September 13, 2004 4:16 PM
Patience, dollface! I was gonna reply to your email when I got back home, and thus also get a copy of the special Daniel\Angelina image you emailed and post it online!
Now the surprise is ruined! Sniffle!
Posted by: Jess | September 13, 2004 4:48 PM
Loved it. Especially Chanel, and Dicko, who had the Kylie T-shirt and was firing on all cylinders.
Did you go Ben-spotting? I knew to hunt for him, and was proud to note his spot in the audience - and then he was right next to James while he was presenting, and then Chanel was searching for him too, so I felt a little less special.
Amali - she walked out, and the first thought was, 'Wow, boobs!' She's a hot sixteen-year-old, that's for sure. And, yeah, I like her voice too - it's not the strongest (those would be Casey and Daniel, I reckon) but she uses it well.
And bloody Dan - yeah, he's good-looking, and he performed well, but Creed? Really? Bastard. Same with Anthony - R Kelly? A Toot toot beep beep song? Why didn't he just sing 'Get Out of My Dreams (And Into My Car)' while he was at it?
And you've hit Marty right on the head - he's a total 'I'm your sexy biatch, watch as I tantalise you with my white, unworked chest.' Which bothers me a little. Not quite as much as it seems to bother you, though, Jess.
And have we really embraced Darren Hayes? Really? Because I didn't get that memo, if we have. And by this stage, I think he's about as ambiguous as, well, Thorpie.
Posted by: Gadge | September 13, 2004 5:35 PM
No its not! Its still good, its still good! (its just a little airborne!!)
I wasnt being impatient I swear! I just felt I should point that out as a valid reason why I dont see the Chanel/Daniel relationship. That is all!
Hopefully no one reads these comments between now and when you make a post! :P
Sorry dear!
Posted by: Adam | September 13, 2004 5:43 PM
Actually I made the Darren Hayes thing up completely. Though he IS pretty sexually ambiguous (in the clearly gay way but still not admitting it...)
What freaks me out is the Brits LOVE Darren! His Popular song is alright, I suppose - it's certainly grown on me, which is saying something - but there's something terribly "Oh, I'm sensitive and artistic but still pop, me!" about him.
Posted by: Jess | September 13, 2004 6:10 PM
Okay, NOW you're just taking the piss.
But big props for getting the bottom 3 so close tonight! Ah, we shall never hear of uber-Christian Dan again. For shame...I shall shed many a tear.
Posted by: scottie | September 13, 2004 9:53 PM
Me? Take the piss? You hurt me with your accusations, scottie!
When Dan left, I thought "Oooh, hope he becomes miserable and has to do a nude photoshoot to fund his new heroin habit" but that is an awful and un-Christian thing to think so don't worry, I feel terrible. Sort of.
I can't BELIEVE I came so close to booting Marty and he still got to stay. Who votes for Marty? Have the IT D&D dorks rigged some kind of SMS-bot online? Or something?
Posted by: Jess | September 14, 2004 9:51 AM
Jess. I'm absolutely gutted that you failed to mention the real star of last sunday night's show. That of course was Ramon, that terrific little dance instructor who was quite a character. Apparently, he's very popular in the homosexual community ...
www.timholland.com
Posted by: D | September 15, 2004 9:27 AM
I heard it from the mouth of an Idol herself.
Emilia is NOT friendly. She is being a bitch backstage & made Hayley cry.(may or may not be because Hayley bagsied a song that Emilia wanted)
Posted by: The Rabbitman | September 18, 2004 9:45 PM
Despite Amali being embarassed with showing of her boobs (oooh! want to touch the heinie! :P~), I was surprised that when she wore that make-up cover over her shoulders (in "Inside Idol"), she flashed her boobs again!
CAMERA ZOOM IN!
Oh my god... I have to run off now. :P
Posted by: antzpantz | September 19, 2004 1:12 AM