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August 29, 2004
The Wildcard Performance Round Up
I haven’t commented on the choices the judges made for the Wildcard show, mostly because I thought their choices were absolute shit. Anthony Calea? Geeez, Mark - your love for Anthony wouldn’t have anything to do with your previous experience working with him, would it? Carlos? Adrian Hood? Honestly, I’m really starting to worry about the judges.
I must say that the judges (again) were being far too nice to the contestants, and as for Dicko’s taste - where has it gone? Has he absentmindedly left it at his grandmothers, a la Ms Hilton and her beloved pooch Tinkerbell? Mr Mark Holden has morphed into the Zen master, constantly meditating and “ummmmmmmm”-ing before rambling off short sentences supposedly filled with great meaning. Useless! Marcia has become the most likable of the judges, and she’s so fucking chirpy and upbeat about their performances, it makes me want to hit her. In a loving way, naturally.
There were some performances I liked tonight. Sadly, since all the performers I liked were women, there is no chance of all of them getting through - especially when the judges are selecting two of the three wildcard entrants and they’re currently in the middle of an inexplicable lovefest with rubbish male contestants. I’m beginning to suspect our Almighty Three might not be up to the task at hand, and it concerns me.
I personally would like to see the following three go through.
1. Emelia - she’s improved in leaps and bounds, she’s likable in a worrying, Lycra loving way. She’s proven herself (via song choices) to be more than a poor man’s Pink. While I don’t think she’d win the competition, I would be interested to see how she goes in the Top Twelve.
2. Ngaiire - a vocal powerhouse, to be sure, and her absence from the Top Three of Group One was a shame. Sadly, the exclusion of a talented singer from that group was inevitable after it was stacked full of polished performers, leaving the other two groups scrounging for someone worthy of the Top Twelve. Tonight’s performance wasn’t her best, but good nonetheless, and I think if she had a chance to hit the Top Twelve, she could be the Paulini of this year’s bunch. And she told James Mathison he’d spat in her eye whilst talking to her, humiliating him and rendering him a blushing mess! Excellent!
3. Liza - I just like Liza, and I’m not entirely sure why. I think it might be because she’s a bit cheeky, I dig her husky voice, and she seems rather devoid of bullshit cheesiness, which is a refreshing change.
Sadly, I don’t think all three of the above will go through, and it’ll be due at least two of the following bunch. Stupid stinkin’ judges’ choice.
Anthony - the judges ranted about how he’d “taken their comments on board” but he must have selective hearing since he managed to repeatedly ignore all references to his dodgy haircut and instead is wearing his trendy mullet with pride. No! No mullets in the Top Twelve, says I!
Carlos - I really, really don’t get the Carlos thing. His hair looks as though a blind hairdresser gripping a Gillette razor unexpectedly had an epileptic fit whilst styling his hair. No mullets and no tracks in the Top Twelve. He seemingly stole his outfit from Michael Jackson’s Bad era (and I don’t mean the kiddyfiddling period), and was it just me or was he singing “San-tor-ia” or “Send-or-ia” rather than the Timberlake approved “Senorita” during the chorus? Is this some sort of Latin insider’s pronunciation that I don’t know about? And the dancing - who slipped the Ritalin in his drink, eh? Own up!
Marty - His head is swelling as the competition goes on, and I don’t just mean in the metaphorical “ego” sense. He may just topple over on stage if it keeps going at this rate! I beg of him, wear a beanie or something. Borrow Dan O’Connor’s baseball cap. But please, no more grinning baldy goon stuff on stage. The judges salivated over him but I couldn’t get past his one-leg-in-front-of-the-other-rock-star-pose… for Keane! That’s like biting a head off a bat whilst singing Savage Garden’s “I Knew I Loved You” - well intentioned and straight from Rawk Moves 101, but rather incongruous nevertheless. Plus he sounded like someone suffering from an unexpected and painful bout of dysentery when he hit the first “ooooooh” bit in the song, which I found incredibly off putting. Other members of my household can’t stand him, but I don’t actually fiercely dislike him - I just think he’s slightly over-rated and the judges tendency to drool over him will probably cost someone more deserving a place in the Top Twelve. He may improve though. Maybe.
Sigh. There’s so much more I could talk about, like Garth Ploog’s Young Talent Time performance (part two) and Adrian Hood’s useless shoulder movements but I’m far too tired and I want to go watch Dogma on DVD. Feel free to disagree with my assessment if you feel the need. You may be right, I may be crazy - but it just may be a lunatic you’re looking for. Don’t let the bells end!
Posted by Jess at August 29, 2004 10:47 PM— Filed under Australian Idol 2004 Blogfest
Comments
ADRIAN BLOODY HOOD! Someone put him in a sack already and hurl him in the river!!
Why the hell is he still here!? Are the judges deaf, dumb and/or blind. Wait dont answer that... there actions speak louder then words.
Dicko even referenced something about Adrian's jerkyness... and I thought to myself HELLO - were you not watching his first performance!!
Carlos... died. Big time. That performance was so shite I had to turn the sound down and watch with giggles at the funny dance moves.
Now... here is where we kinda disagree. Im not offended by Marty. I think he needs to grow some hair. But that smile is of his always makes me wanna laugh... its so oversized. Bonus points for looking weird. And he did okay.. you could tell from the rehearsal footage though that he was singing much better then. But I didnt mind him.
Anthony... hrmm... I didnt mind his song, nor his voice. I just want to get in there and beat him round the head till he is black and blue - simply so he doesnt look so perfect. Honestly... to use that much product... sigh he is channeling his inner Queer.
Whats this with holden working with him before?
Garth and Tara are out of there. Why'd we bring them back? But I dont think Emily's performance rates some mention...
But... I am in total agreeance with you on the top three. Those girls rock "to the max" and I think they deserve top12.... however with Dicko deciding jess.. you and I will be most dissapointed!
Posted by: Adam | August 30, 2004 12:50 AM
Just to get it out of the way: You can guess how I feel that Ben didn't make it in. Bleugh.
Also, Have to get through - Emelia and Ngaiire. Don't mind, would even quite like, if they get through - Marty, Liza, Anthony (and I'm surprised by that last one). Shouldn't get through - Garth, Adrian, Carlos. The two young girls were dull, so no more is to be said.
Carlos - he's just so... manufactured. Even worse, he's Sebastian-esque, which I need not remind anyone is a terrible, terrible thing. Plus his hair is ridiculous. Plus, since when is Justin Timberlake this untouchable music god? I kind of wish he'd gotten to the talky bit in the song, because hearing Carlos going on all white-boy-soul 'Wanna get witchoo' would have been more comedy gold than Garth's stylings.
Garth - we're meant to like wankers now? No, we like larrikins. We despise, beyond whinging, beyond whiners, beyond try-hards, we despise wankers. And he is one, through and through. Not nearly a good enough singer, either.
I was surprised to like Anthony more this time round - perhaps it was because he let the style-team matte his face so as to not be I, Robot anymore. I also don't mind Marty, as he can sing and does bring something a little different, even if that something is just a bald head.
But, yeah - Emelia and Ngaiire I thought both brought it completely in, and need to be in the final 12. At the very least, I think Ngaiire is a cinch for a judges choice, just so their friends don't bash 'em. I just hope they can restrict themselves to one guy not two, so that the talented women of this competition can get their rightful chance to shine.
Posted by: Gadge | August 30, 2004 3:52 AM
Personalities aside, out of the 10 last night i'd say that Marty, Ngairre and Emily have the potential to make the best record. I'd like 2 c them get through. Yerss ...
Posted by: D | August 30, 2004 10:58 AM
To be honest, I don't dislike Marty enough to warrant my gentle teasing (cough) above. I must have just been a little surly after discovering that the judges pick TWO of the wildcards and the audience only chooses one. I do think he sounded like he had a bowel irritation during the first "oooh" part, but I'll overlook it. I'm fairly sure the judges will pick him, and I don't think he is as good as they make him out to be, but I would prefer him to some bland pretty boy doing a bad Boyz II Men impersonation.
Anthony - how embarrassing! I can't remember where I'd read they worked together in the past. I think it might have been NW Magazine or perhaps (gulp) TV Week, but I'm not sure. I definitely read it though. I hope. I searched the Internet for information but the only thing that came up was a previous ausculture.com comment made about the Holden-Calea connection! I'll go through my old mags at home and see if I can scan the article... should it not be a figment of my imagination...
Posted by: Jess | August 30, 2004 11:18 AM
Ben would have been a far better male choice than Carlos or Adrian. I agree that they're trying to give us another Guy R&B kinda voice, but I don't hate Guy at all and I loathe Carlos. Sort of. As much as you can loathe a reality TV show contestant. He said something really egotistical in the pre-performance footage, like "I know I'm greatly talented" or something along those lines, and his hair is rubbish. He bounced around like a hyperactive midget. Altogether worrying. All in all, I feel like they're trying to make the public embrace Carlos like they did Guy, which is as forced and pointless as the AOC trying to make us love Jana Pittman the same way we loved Cathy Freeman in 2000.
I must be an absolute freak because I can't muster up a huge dislike of Garth. I mean, yeah - he's a spanker and a half, he is completely over the top while performing, his hair is terrible and getting increasingly worse, and he's cheesier than Peter Russell Clarke. Yet... he seems like a nice bloke. I dunno. I must be getting soft in my old age.
Posted by: Jess | August 30, 2004 11:35 AM
Judges picks Anthony and Emelia. Ngaiire was in the top 2 of viewer's picks but lost out to Marty.
Posted by: B | August 30, 2004 9:33 PM